Control Me Not
Attempts are made to influence on a day to day basis, with people trying to exert control over our lives and our decisions. Those who control way too much are probably suffering from another problem that is acutely felt in relationships by straining them as a result. Those people might have developed a low self esteem for various reasons, including some faulty parenting from the early on period, which has a long term bearing on their life and other areas of life. Now every person has that controlling streak present in our characted, but it could be more tertiary than self evident and the major trait, or could be be concealed as passive aggressive, if not addressed through a theraphy.
Why is control so important to them? Even if they are at their wits’ ends when it comes to filling up the void in their hearts and souls, they rely mightily on their partners to fill that for them, and yet, on the other side, they are deeply fearful deep inside that one day they might find out the partner to be gone from their life for the reasons like too much control. Clinging partners or ivy poison types rely excessively on the support from their husbands, and those relationships are called co-dependent. While the ivy type personality could have enough positive values to him or her, the controlling behavior will finally be unmasked, if the partner decides to draw the line or push the boundaries of the comfort zone way too much for that person to accept that step.
The prognosis for that particular relationship are far from being positive, as the dependent is struggling mightily to stand on their own feet somehow and yet fails at most corners, while the other partner starts to build up a wall of discontent and indifference, finally leading to a split, at times long forecast by the ivy personality as inevitable and self induced. Interestingly enough, the behavior could run in the family, with the weak personality being dependent on other family members, leeching off them to a large degree. The problematic behaviors could be addressed through a long term therapy, dynamic approach or CBT.
There is plenty of work involved for patients with controlling and low esteem issues that are deeply ingrained in their personality, with some typical distorted thought patterns present, thus, further predisposing them to some depression. Some recent research shows depression is about neurons’ miscommunication than serotonine levels, while it can be triggered by a multitude of reasons. Interestingly enough, with depression, most people present enough resilience to dramatic events, with low moods coming back to normalcy than in other subjects tested in that matter. The findings show that much is yet to be discovered about possible causes and treatment of the disease.